I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
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I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
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We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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