He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize