We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
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I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
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They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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