If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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