Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
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