Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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