y did u give ur computer a hand job?
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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