So drunk its hurt
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize