I accidentally had phone sex last night
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I need to sanitize my soul.
Randomize