Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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