Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
her vagine was all disorganized.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
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