His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize