I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
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His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
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Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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