I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize