dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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