Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder

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  (310): This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder http://tfl.nu/q5de
  Replies (4) Good night (662) Bad night (1507) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work

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  (214): I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work http://tfl.nu/fhj1
  Replies (47) Good night (628) Bad night (3334)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot

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  (904): at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot http://tfl.nu/zopv
  Replies (60) Good night (737) Bad night (3832) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.

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  (248): i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding. http://tfl.nu/2d2l
  Replies (35) Good night (1476) Bad night (6441) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.

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  (920): call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing. http://tfl.nu/ctbc
  Replies (8) Good night (631) Bad night (2796) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.

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  (407): She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast. http://tfl.nu/4kxl
  Replies (7) Good night (2949) Bad night (1268) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.

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  (614): I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder. http://tfl.nu/za6c
  Replies (21) Good night (4815) Bad night (734) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't

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  (403): If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't http://tfl.nu/df5x
  Replies (20) Good night (3080) Bad night (2415) Order T-Shirt
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.

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  (205): I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine. http://tfl.nu/wlnl
  Replies (50) Good night (2302) Bad night (7661) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.

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  (201): He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty. http://tfl.nu/jiec
  Replies (3) Good night (1836) Bad night (849) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.

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  (416): Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life. http://tfl.nu/bd2a
  Replies (1) Good night (905) Bad night (356)
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  (925): View more from California

  I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop

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  (925): I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop http://tfl.nu/0pj9
  Replies (1) Good night (670) Bad night (202) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment

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  (303): that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment http://tfl.nu/t2of
  Replies (3) Good night (403) Bad night (186) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!

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  (937): Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would! http://tfl.nu/dkq8
  Replies (8) Good night (660) Bad night (174)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.

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  (425): I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it. http://tfl.nu/yofk
  Replies (1) Good night (719) Bad night (344) Order T-Shirt

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