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This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
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