We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Well I just put wine in my tea
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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