That's intense
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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