If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
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