HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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