I think my fart just growled at me.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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