Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I lost the right to judge tonight
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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