Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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