It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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