dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
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