Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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