I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I smell like Dick and happiness
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize