I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize