Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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