The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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