i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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