all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize