I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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