And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
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We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
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I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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