I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize