oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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