Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
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