Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
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I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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