She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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