she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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