My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize