Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize