But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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