Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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