I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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