WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize