Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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