btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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