since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm both gender and math confused
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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