So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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